Raising Black Children in 2010

Now when i initially wanted to blog about this I was going to blog about "The Education In America", explaining how we need to get off out asses as parents and not just allow your child's teacher to be their only source of education's in their lives. But then I started talking to myself. I said "Self!" and myself said "Huh?" and I told myself that I need to take an extra step in describing how I go from day to day raising my Black Children in America in 2010. I think that I am lucky because I am married to one of the strongest black men that I have ever met in my WHOLE life. I was lucky as a child because even though I grew up without a father and a mother I had help from my family. I was an orphan and was raised by everybody ELSE in my family. I have a piece of almost everyone of my older family members in me because each person instilled something in my character and made me into the person that I am now. When I had homework it was mandatory that I showed it to someone to check it and it had to be done before 6pm. I am going to list some of the things that I know will make your house less confrontational with respectful children and well educated.

First of all being that I was raised by my grandmother I am a 29 year old OLD SCHOOL parent. My children have rules and they will fear me before they fear God. There is no conversations or negotiations when you are the child and I am the parent. That doesn't mean that I don't allow my children to have a voice or to express themselves but YOU WILL do it respectfully. Everything has a time and a place. Alot of people think just because you whip your children they are going to end up being perfect children and will learn the lesson. But, just like with a dog...if he poops in the house...you can smack the hell out of him but if you do not rub his nose in that SHIT (literally) then he will think you are beating him for no reason. You have to explain before and after the reason why they are getting reprimanded. They will not know if you don't tell them, and making them aware of the things that are unacceptable will keep them from doing it again unless they are just out of control. You have to have unmovable and permanent rules that they won't even think about asking for wiggle room because somethings should be mandated. Doing this will instill order and organization in their inner core and in their character as adults and they will eventually do the same with their children. Trust me I know. LOL

Start young with your children doing education things with them so they will look at education as being a FUN event!Encourage your children! Praise them...over and over and over again !! You have to be an advocate for your child's education because the public school system just wants to get them in and out with getting funding for them which is why they PUSH for every student to be present on student count day. Raising a black boy in America is different from raising a black girl in America because they both need the same love and they have certain things they HAVE to learn besides boys learning to pee and the birds and the bees talk with the girl when she gets her period. They need to learn what it means to be a black man and a black woman and the best way they can get confirmation is by seeing you as an example.

Doing homework is one of those things where there should be absolutely NO wiggle room. My kids laugh at me because I have been homeschooling them ever since they were 3 years old. When they come home to MY HOUSE they have the homework their teacher has given and then they have HOME work which is the work I have for them to do. I go the extra mile for my children because sacrifices have to be made on my account in order to get them to where I want them to be. I refuse to put them in a private school for them to get a better education. Don't throw the public schools away...there are some good teachers out there and if you happen to get a teacher that has their "Tenyear" already and doesn't care then you give that BITCH a run for her money. I'm talking about asking to see her lesson a month in advance and you get online and look to see if what she is teaching the kids in the grade equivalent to other school districts. Make her/him hate to see yo ass coming. For those of you who are not aware of what it means when a teacher gets their "Tenyear"...that means that after a certain number of years teachers have a permanent job forever and they have 100% job security and doesn't have to worry about proving anything to anyone because their job is secure so they can basically just show up and give out work and then put their iPod in their ears and that would be their prerogative. With my kid's teachers I make myself available financially and physically. So it is not like I am just this "Dragon Bitch" that is just mean to all my kid's teachers. But they know I am not to be fucked with even if we do have a good relationship. I am raising the next president of the United States of America, the next State Senator, the next heart surgeon, the next CEO of a fortune 500 company....I am raising celebrities. Yeah, I have ALL of that hope for my twins and you should too. Do you?

Another thing you have to do is be PRESENT. I don't give a damn if you have to get a different job to make yourself present in their school and in sports activities for them so they will succeed. Never allow excuses because they are just like an asshole..everybody's got one. I am just so sick of these sorry ass parents not being ALL UP IN their kid's business. Moniter internet access, go get the program that records what they are doing on the internet. Are you snooping?! Why is that even a topic? You are a parent, it is your responsibility to keep them away from hurt, harm and danger. Reduce TV to only weekends. Hannah Montana can kiss my ass. There is no logical why children should watch TV during the week. Make rules with them that is going to better their lives. Now being that I cut out TV during the week that means that we do educational things and fun things that are physical activities outside so they will not fall in the 70% of overweight children in the US. Even if you go for a walk with your kids and count how many trees you see there and on the way back and give a prize for the correct answer. Make things like that fun. You know what? when the weekend comes around, they will be so used to not watching TV that they might not even have the urge. Kids should only be able to do what you ALLOW them to do.

You should not be "strict" without explaining why you do what you do. I wake them up an hour early in the morning and read with them. Why do I do that? They have to be more advanced as black children to be able to be accepted in this world even though they are 8 years old. I have had to teach and have a conversation with them that white parents don't have to have. I had to explain what slavery was. I had to explain why the color of their skin can still prevent them from getting something that they might deserve. I had to explain affirmative action. I had to give the definition of racism. I had to tell them where the word NIGGER came from and why I never want to hear that damn word in my house. These are conversations I have been having with them since the age of 6 years old. You say that's too young...my children are intelligent, you could have a full length conversation with my kids about racism and be surprised by their answers. I am raising black children in America in 2010.

My daughter and my son knows what rape is. They know that some adults and even younger kids have a problem with "touching people in private parts" I have explained that in the most PG and G way that I knew how, but I need to educate them to know what it is and how not to put themselves in a predicament where something like that can happen. I moniter the type of clothes she wears and there are certain things she can't do like eat a popsicle outside or bent over with her butt facing the street or walk out of the bathroom without being fully dressed. You may think that is too much but I don't want to give anybody any ideas. You may think that is too extreme but I bet JonBenet' Ramsey's parents wished they went a different route with their daughter. Truth is brutal but it will always be the truth.

We have to do better as parents. I will leave you with this quote.

"Excuses are monuments of nothingness. They build bridges to nowhere. Those who use these tools of incompetence are masters of nothingness. Therefore there are no excuses."

Get it together.
Angie~(Peaches)